Separated at birth?

This has absolutely nothing to do with sports, but Bravo has gone too far this time. They are casting the case person in two of their Housewives series.

Housewife of New Jersey, Danielle Staub and Housewife of New York City, LuAnn "Countess" de Lesseps

Note: I am not proud of this.

Separated at Birth?

Cleveland Indians C Kelly Shoppach and Boston Red Sox C Jason Varitek. Oddly enough, Shoppach used to be Varitek's backup.

Separated at Birth?

Chicago White Sox SS Alexei Ramirez (estimated weight 140 lbs.) and Gumby

Separated at Birth?

LA Lakers C Pau Gasol and... well, you can figure it out.

Quit your whining, Pau.

Separated at Birth?

Neither of these two individuals qualifies as a sports fgure, but I saw MG's face on the cover of ESPN.com so we can include it here.

Author Malcolm Gladwell and Actor Christopher Walken

Triple Dose of "Separated," Double Dose of "Pet Peeves," and More

Separated at Birth (Part I)?

Former Johns Hopkins Blue Jay and Baltimore Orioles farmhand, Paul Winterling and NY Mets slugger Ryan Church.

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Separated at Birth (Part II)?

Milwaukee Brewers superstar Ryan Braun and "The Sports Guy" Bill Simmons. (Note: This is strictly based on looks because comparing these two athletically would be like comparing LeBron James and my sister)

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Separated at Birth (Part III)?

Denver Nugget PF Chris "Birdman" Anderson and Jon Bon Jovi

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Sports Pet Peeve #30: Bruce Springsteen saying "speedball" instead of "fastball" during the song Glory Days. Come on, Bruce. You are better than that.

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Sports Pet Peeve #100: The fact that the country's worst-run professional franchises in each of the four major sports can win their respective lotteries and receive the first overall pick in their drafts (see Lions, Clippers, Islanders, Nationals). These teams, in essence, get rewarded for making awful decisions.

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This is a bit of a teaser as the Banter will be on another hiatus until the first week of June.

Thanks again for all the support.

Separated at Birth?

Nascar driver Tony Stewart and Houston Astros' 1B Lance Berkman

Thanks to loyal reader Lance Uppercut for the suggestion.